People always ask us what is the “secret” to transformation. They want to know about the magic diet plan or exercise. While Chris and I are certainly partial to our diet and exercise approach to weight loss, a quick Google search will pull up hundreds of ways to effectively lose weight. I’ll tell it to you straight: Looking to transform through diet and exercise is like making your way through a house of mirrors. There’s confusion everywhere, but one path that is always true. And that path has nothing to do with diet and exercise.
https://youtu.be/EXd8BEurYfs
Once you shift your focus to see the hidden path, everything changes. Let me show you!
“I promise” is a pretty common phrase. But what does it actually mean? It simply means you’ll do (or not do) what you say you’ll do (or not do). When you make a promise to someone else—you give them your word—you know you would move mountains to keep that promise.
But what about the promises you make to yourself?
Are these promises any different than those you make to others?
They shouldn’t be.
In fact, the promises you make to yourself should be the most important you keep because you are so, so important and others depend on you to be your best self.
Let’s be honest: While you’d never think of breaking a promise made to others, you’re often not as good at keeping those you make to yourself. This is especially true with us women—you know I’m right! 😉
Why is this?
Besides the fact that we often put ourselves and our needs and goals on the bottom of the list, there are some other reasons. To put it simply, there are two types of promises: those you keep and those you don’t. The main reason promises fit into the latter category is because they’re too big—they’re inflated. Some examples:
- I will do thirty minutes of cardio every morning.
- I will eat five smaller meals every day.
- I will never eat pizza again.
These types of promises are doomed from the get-go. There is no way they can be kept.
Another example of inflated promises is when you make too many promises to yourself at once, like if you tried to keep all three of the above promises. At one time.
Get the picture? Something will always happen to derail these types of promises, and that’s life.
So how do you make promises you can keep 100% of the time?
It’s actually a pretty simple process, and it’s followed by all our peeps on Extreme Weight Loss. They make a single promise to themselves—a promise that’s virtually unbreakable—and they keep it. Then they make another promise, and they keep that one. And so on. Look at it this way:
- Each promise you make is a brick in the personal transformation you’re building.
- Each promise you keep is the mortar that holds these bricks together, so your transformation foundation gets stronger with each promise kept.
Yes, I hear you: “That sounds great, Heidi, but how do I make promises I can keep no matter what? I’ve got this, and this, and this that get in the way.”
Here’s the secret: Your first promise to yourself—the first brick in your transformation foundation—must be so small that it’s actually doable, even when life gets in the way, because it will. And that’s a promise!
Here’s an example:
- When people ask how much cardio to do to burn fat, my answer is, “Five minutes.” Whatever activity you choose, do it for five minutes. That’s all. This is a promise you can keep every single day. And if those five minutes lead to five minutes more, that’s even better! But the promise is for only five minutes. And it’s not about the cardio—it’s about keeping that promise you made to yourself. That’s the key!
Simply put, our peeps keep their promises. If they promise themselves they’ll do thirty minutes of cardio, they do thirty minutes…maybe more. They NEVER stop at twenty-nine minutes. Never. And if we try to pull them off that treadmill at 29 minutes, they’ll shove us out of the way and get right back on!
Here’s another helpful hint:
- Successful promise keepers say their promises and goals out loud, and they also write them down. Share yours with those who love and support you, and you’ll be surprised how quickly these supporters become your biggest fans who will move those mountains to help you keep the promises you’ve made to yourself. It’s awesome!
So what do you do when you break a promise to yourself? You don’t quit, that’s for sure. There’s definitely a learning curve when you’re perfecting your ability to keep promises to yourself, and our peeps face this same learning curve pretty much every day as they’re developing this promise-keeping habit. When they break a promise to themselves, we follow this process: Confess to someone about the broken promise, Reassess to ensure the promise you made is a SMART promise/goal, and Recommit to something more attainable. It works for them, and I know it will work for you too!
Remember: Each promise kept—each brick laid—builds a strong foundation of self-esteem and confidence that is rock-solid and indestructible.
Make that first promise to yourself and lay that first brick in your own transformation foundation.
And do it today!
Xoxo,
Heidi
Still wanting more? Don’t forget to join us on our next journey with the TRANSFORM app.
180 Responses
More Water!
I am pretending I am in a desert and I need to be a camel so I can make it through.
“Hey Mike, Guess what day it is……”
WATER DAY!
Love it!
I promise to stay true to myself in this diet bet!
Great promise!
Hi! I am trying to figure out which plan to start with. I have done your carb cycling plan before but didn?t follow the structure on days and just picked my own low and high carb days. I am pretty lean and am just looking to clean up my eating and get a little more toned. I am 5? 4 and 114 lbs. I currently do CrossFit 4-5 days a week. What plan would you suggest I do?
Hi Corinne! We suggest you begin with the Extreme Cycle. If you’re not using the app, you can find more information about the Extreme Cycle here: https://heidipowell.net/10503 Based on your goal, this post can be helpful too: https://heidipowell.net/15538 You got this! 🙂
That sounds doable. I am going to start a journal today
I promise to drink a gallon of water a day, as well as stay on top of my workout routine. It?s been a little hard with an infant, but I promise to make time for my health and sanity.:)
Thanks you guys
Anyone can say what to do buts it?s us who have to be decided and stay strong ?? ?
Hi Heidi, thanks for sending this blog to me. As I was reading it, I couldn’t help but cry in frustration. I made many promises at beginning of 2018, lost 25 pounds and gained the weight back. Turned into old bad eating habits and I feel I failed for letting myself fall back into it. It is so hard getting back in track. I honestly feel that even if I get back on track eating healthy, I will fall again into bad habits.
Hi Enil: Thank you so much for your comment and for your vulnerability. That, alone, is a huge step on your transformation journey! Let’s not focus on the past, let’s focus on today. What one promise will you make and keep today? It can be super simple! You got this!
I really like this idea and can see the impact it will have on me for the rest of my life. This is about more than a couple months, years, commitment. How long do you suggest we wait before we make the second promise to ourself? 2 weeks?
Hi Brittney: Great question! We suggest you wait until you’re confident you’ve got promise #1 down. Then make another promise and go from there. 🙂
This is the blog that started my transformation January 2017….started with the small promise of drinking enough water …. trying every day. One meal at a time! Would love to win transform bands!! ???? Instagram handle @strongnotskinny0130
This is super encouraging to read about these small and do-able goals. I feel pretty confident I can carve out five minutes a day to deliberately move. I’ve even been trying to do this while at the stove cooking dinner for my family. I get a few weird looks, but it’s making better use of my time. And I feel so accomplished afterwards – the confidence just builds from there. Super excited about the Lose Your Love Handles DietBet game I started today! I just completed my first DietBet with another game and it was so neat to see my transformation in my pictures. I love the accountability; and the deadline to enter a photo of yourself at the end of the game gives you evidence to look back on of how far you have come in your journey. Just love this whole program – so glad I found it! Chris and Heidi, thank you so much for the encouragement, ideas and motivation!!! It’s like I have my own personal trainers.
Hi Joanne: We’re so excited you’ve joined the game! And yay! for you for keeping those promises to yourself! 🙂