In speaking to a group of new friends, I had the opportunity to share my thoughts on “perfection”. It made me think of this post, one of the earliest posts I ever wrote for my blog, that really hit home with so many people when I shared it. Enjoy!
I am Perfect.
Perfectly imperfect, that is.
I use the word ?perfect ? a lot, and often times had people remind me that nothing is perfect. I totally disagree. I believe that everyone and every thing is perfect and beautiful in its imperfect state of being. Think about that for one second ? imagine that just maybe your imperfections actually make you perfect. Don?t you just love the freedom that thought gives you? Well, time to realize the reality of the thought and let go of our self-judgments and negative self-talk. It?s time to embrace our imperfections.
Now I?m not saying to throw caution to the wind and go indulge in a gallon of super chunky triple chocolate fudgy goo. I?m saying that it?s okay to mess up, and it?s okay to have faults. For those of you that don?t, I?m sorry. These faults, trials, imperfections and stumbles are our some of our greatest blessings ? they?re our ?springboards? to becoming the strongest person we can possibly be!
So why do we so often find ourselves “masking up” for the day before we go out in public? Why do we all feel the need to pretend to be something we are not? Why are we so scared of who we really are? Every time we put on that mask we feel beautiful and invincible. We put on a show of perfection for our friends, family, co-workers, and acquaintances?everyone. We?re not true to them, but most importantly we are not true to ourselves. We are a fraud.
Ever feel that way? I sure have, and I still find myself there at times. I have to remind myself of a lesson I learned from my late father: true beauty comes from being honest and authentic.
You?re scared. I hear you. It?s not easy to peek out from behind that mask and share our difficulties and challenges with the world. But trust me, it?s worth it! The freedom that comes with being vulnerable, open, and real is unlike anything else. It?s the most liberating thing I?ve ever experienced, and without a doubt it has become one of the most powerful tools in my arsenal.
?Heidi, this is easy for you to say. You don?t have imperfections like I do.? FALSE! The camera is deceiving and shallow.
Behold, a Top 10 list of only some of my many imperfections:
- I have bunions.
- My nostrils flare to the size of a nickel when I laugh (those of you who know me know EXACTLY what I?m talking about!)
- My hair might be beautiful?but only because I clip in extensions (and that?s not the only enhanced part of me).
- I am a control freak (I?m working on it ? so darn hard though, and not sure I?m making much improvement).
- I have food issues too.
- One of my eyes is lazy when I smile and I am SO self-conscious about it.
- Chris is my soul mate and best friend, and so often we post pictures of us when things are fun and rosy, but we, like every other couple, have challenges and differences that we?re always working on.
- I am tempted 99.9% of the time to cheat during my workouts.
- No matter how hard I work on my abs, I will always have a belly button that could be mistaken for a nose.
- I don?t wake up looking camera-ready. ?Thank goodness for hair and makeup artists!
So many more, but there?s not enough room in this blog.
So, how do you find this place of peace with yourself as you are?
Rule 62 ? DON?T TAKE YOURSELF SO DAMN SERIOUSLY (thanks again, Dad).
Don?t be scared or embarrassed. You?re in a safe place and it?s time for a heart to heart conversation with the most important person in your life – YOU! Dig deep and allow yourself to see those imperfections. Try seeing the beauty in your flaws (yes, that bump on your nose makes you YOU!). Realize the lessons and strength that your imperfections have given you. And most importantly, don?t worry about what other people think. One of my favorite sayings is, ?Those who mind don?t matter and those who matter don?t mind.?
Now go be your perfectly imperfect self ?:-).
184 Responses
I needed this post! I feel so unhappy about myself most of the time!
Used to read it again and again and again on a bad self esteem day.
Younger I wanted to be perfect because I taught it was the way to get my mum’s attention because she never noticed me. I spent all my free time from the age of 11 to my 18 birthday trying to get better at school, in sports, trying to make her proud, being the perfect daughter …. until I totally forgot who I was, who I truly was. I was someone I didn’t want to be. But I taught it was making my mum proud of me. I had a depression, a very bad one when I was 18. Tried to kill myself and nearly did. When I woke up in intensive cares with tubes in every part of my body keeping me alive I was in shock. What have I done ? My mum didn’t even show up to the hospital. She didn’t care about me, her own daughter. It hurt a lot but this day I realized that if she never paid attention to me when I was her “perfect” daughter, when I was dying, when I needed her so she was never going to do. This day I realized that I didn’t want to pretend being someone else anymore. I could be myself. When I leaved the hospital I was someone else. It wasn’t easy to not be that perfect girl because pretend being perfect was who I was and acting on the different way wasn’t easy. But now one year and half later my life is so much different. So much better. I did what I wanted to do. I moved in Ireland even if she not agreed. I learnt English, what I always wanted to do. And I accept doing mistakes every day, when I’m speaking . Yes it’s not perfect (sorry about it) but it doesn’t matter. At 20 years old I’m finally myself. The imperfect girl. And you know what ? I love being that girl.
Wow good for you stay strong. And be the best you can be everyday. And most of all love your self for better or worse.
I love you heidi.your real.beautiful and authentic. I love to watch you and I’m always thinking if i could just get to be with her for about one month.just one month of her strenghth, determination, wisdom and insight could change what life .I have left.you understand how women feel,I want to be real enough to turn people’s lives around.. however It may never happen because I have been fighting this battle for 39 years myself.i just can’t t seem to win.keep going and blessing others you were born for this.you bring people freedom, hope and life in this world.ill keep watching and cheering you on.its great to see you both full fill your purpose in life….One person at a time can change the world..
Was feeling extremely imperfect/not good enough…to the point of tears this morning when I found this. Thank you. I really needed this today.
Thank you so much for this Heidi, really. I’m struggling with a food addiction and self worth issues with my many imperfections. Love you and Chris and I always watch EWL.
I so needed to hear this. I just realized recently that I punish my weld with food. Don’t feel as though I deserve to look/feel good. I’ve yo-yoed all my life and when I am in I am all in!!! Hard core! But when I’m out…..I’m horrible to my body!! It’s so sad. I really don’t have anyone I can talk to although my husband is supportive. He doesn’t understand my thoughts and body image disturbance but he respects it. I really don’t want people I am “friends” with on fb to see this post. I need something to kick my a$$!!! Thanks so much for sharing!!!!
Thank you for posting this. I have the same problem with my feet and am always so ashamed to show them. We all appreciate your honesty.
You are a beautiful person, Heidi, inside and out. I read this when I’m feeling down and it’s so inspiring!
Heidi, I don’t know if you will read this or not, but I have to say, I am 32 years old and this post hit home! I have had a few of the same issues as you, and to see you on t.v looking absolutely gorgeous, I too have to accept the perfect imperfections and embrace them…Thank you from the bottom of my heart for this post…really. 🙂
Well said Heidi! Thank you for sharing your imperfections and insecurities. You are one of my biggest role models and I admire you for being so real with us! <3